Notes for people at the pool

To all the people doing very slow backstroke (and in some cases – backstroke with kickboards -> not using arms) in the “Medium Any Stroke” lane: Backstroke is inherently a slow stroke. Backstroke without using arms is even slower. This is not a suitable stroke for the “Medium” lane – the fact that 6 people were queuing right behind you should have been a hint in this direction. In future, please confine your backstroking activities to the “Slow” lane.

To woman in yellow swimmers: Initially I wondered why you were in the “Medium Any Stoke” lane when your pace was faster than that of most people in the “Medium Freestyle Only” lane. This wonderment was especially pronounced when you started overtaking everyone in the lane. Eventually thought I figured it out – you have no concept of pacing yourself, and you quickly tired, and started holding up everyone in the lane instead.

To the young boy constantly following us around the pool with his eyes: yes, you’re gay. No, we’re not a couple. If you’d like to talk about it, feel free.. I’m not at all sexually interested in you, so you have nothing to fear there.

To the nasty old man persistently being rude to me: I’m not at all interested in you, either. Not sexually, not in any other way. I ignored your deliberate physical contact as we were swimming as mistakes. Floating less than a foot away from me in the aquatherapy pool staring at me was unforgiveable though, as was sitting so close beside me on the ledge that I was forced to touch you every time I moved. I’m not interested, I made this abundantly clear, and still you persisted in bothering me. Your persistent staring was not appreciated, neither was your choosing to sit right next to me and openly ogle me in the shower and getting changed.

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